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Story Mode except Adam is named Kevin and I'm not taking anything seriously


Katumai

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Title says it all-

 

 

Somewhere, on an isolated island, a nicheling awoke.

"What-"

He scanned his surroundings, honestly barely even fazed at this. Maybe it happened a lot or something.

"This is one of the more normal dreams I've had, which means it's probably real. Maybe if I-"

Then, he bit himself. Hard. You know, because that's the obvious solution.

"Wow! That hurt! Huh, guess I'm stuck here. Maybe I can get back home in time for dinner. It would be nice to not have Frost eating my fried chicken, mom only brings it once a week. Oh boy, I can just hear mom now- 'kEVIN YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO BE HOME TWO MONTHS AGO' well sorry mom, but I woke up on a swamp island in the middle of literally nowhere and two months was the fastest I could get back! You oversized sack of rotten potatoes!"

.................

"Oh yeah, I should probably get going."

 

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"Huh, this island looks vaguely familiar...oh yeah! Aunt Jennifer took me here once with Cousin Fred! That was fun, I sure do miss them! If only Fred hadn't-"

Then, something fell from the grass, landing on top of Kevin.

"aHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-"

"OH JESUS I THINK I KILLED IT-"

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-wait...oh, you're a nicheling!"

"OH, thank God, you're not dead. That scream killed my ears."

"Nope! Not dead! sometimes I kinda wish I was  What's your name? I'm Kevin!"

"Kevin?...uh, Edith. I'm Edith."

"Wow! That name is really dumb!"

"At least mine doesn't sound like my mother didn't love me."

"...ow."

"So, how did you get here Kevin?"

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After an explanation, the two left the tiny island, finding themselves on...a slightly less tiny island,

 

"Do you think we'll find any fried chicken here?"

"..Fried chicken? Kevin, there isn't a KFC for miles, WE ARE IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE! THE CLOSEST THING IS AN ARBYS!"

"I think I would rather starve than eat at Arby's."

"How about you go eat a poisonous plant and die?"

"Haha! Ahh, I love your jokes!"

"On second thought, maybe I'll eat those poisonous plants."

 

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After some more high-pitched screams from Kevin, this...guy was invited to join them.

 

"So, what's your name?"

"Gandalf."

"I officially wish I was never born. Please tell me you aren't serious?"

"Of course not! My real name is Plastic Water Bottle."

"....that's somehow worse."

 

 

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"Do you ever wonder what built these things?"

"Probably just some ancient nichelings-"

"I like to think it was the eldritch being Cthulu, giving us some comfort before he rises to the depths of the ocean to reap our souls."

...............

"Nah! That's dumb! Cthulu doesn't reap souls!"

"I would rather literally be burning to death right now than sit here a second longer with you two."

 

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3 minutes ago, PincerClaw420 said:

*sniffs* the brimming story, emotion... This is truly one of your greatest works, Katumai...

Before I leave and OBBACL who? We only know Kevin

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4 minutes ago, PincerClaw420 said:

*sniffs* the brimming story, emotion... This is truly one of your greatest works, Katumai...

Agreed

Just now, Possum Girl said:

Before I leave and OBBACL who? We only know Kevin

Wha? What are those first two things? I think someone's imagining thing again-

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(I'm gonna start color-coding the text-)

Kevin

Edith

PWB (Plastic Water Bottle)

 

"Wow! This island is HUGE!"

"About the same size as the one I was born on."

"I wouldn't know, I was born in the ocean. At least I learned to swim early on."

"What...but you don't have any water genes??"

"Oh, I know. Mother didn't like me much."

"Is...is there something you wanna talk about?-"

 

"gUYS HELP THIS CRABBIT WAS NOT FRIENDLY OW IT HURTS-"

 

 

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"Kevin, get out of the nest."

"bUT EEEEEDDDIIIITHHHHHH, I'M TIIIIRRRREEEEDDDD!"

"And you're going to have four broken legs if you don't get out of the damn nest."

 

 

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"Took you long enough to let us rest!"

"Well, we won't be sitting here much longer. Just until Plastic comes back with the fish."

"Aw c'mon! We've been running around nonstop for days! Can't we just sleep here tonight? The port is only a few feet away, and we'll have lots of energy to cross in the morning-"

"No."

"Why are you so uptight? We need to get back to our homes fast, but we have time! Mom won't miss me anyway."

"Well, unlike you, I have actual responsibilities. There are people I can't just leave alone."

 

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"Do you think we're lost?"

"Kevin, we don't have a home, we can't be lost. We're travellers."

"Well it feels kinda weird out here-oH JESUS IT'S A DEMON! EDITH, SAVE ME-"

"Demons don't exist Kevin-OH JESUS THAT'S ALMOST WORSE!"

All three nichelings turned to see a rogue male waddling his way over, looking very much like a deformed, terrifying penguin that only brings chaos wherever it goes.

"We uh...have another problem."

Oops, a bearyena too!

"WE'RE GONNA DIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! AND I NEVER GOT TO EAT MY FRIED CHICKEN! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-"

"Here's the plan! Kevin, keep the creepy pervert away from me while me and Plastic fight the bearyena!"

"Wait but-"

"Just do it!"

 

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"That went better than I thought it would."

"Aside from the fact that Kevin was too scared to do much of anything with the rogue."

"He was pokey! Since we walk so much I didn't need to prick my paws on any spines, thanks!"

 

"Why aren't you a fine bunch."

"aHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-"

"Oh, another nicheling. Kevin, it's okay."

"When did you show up?"

"I've been watching you for a while."

"Yeah uh, that's definitely not creepy-what's your name?"

"My name is Rezu! Prince of-"

"SCARING PEOPLE?! I NEARLY DIED!"

"If only."

"Would you like to join us? We have room for more."

 

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"Unfortunately, this is where I must leave you."

"WHAT?! WHY?"

"I can smell my home to the west, I must go there. I can't keep you from continuing your journey."

"We're sad to see you go. No really, that's not even me being sarcastic-"

"You have the ability to do that?-"

"I really will miss you. You're a good friend. Until our paths cross again?"

"Until our paths cross again."

"GUYS! I CAN SMELL A MCDONALDS ON THE NEXT ISLAND! LET'S GO-"

 

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"An archipelago?! Seriously?!"

"It's not that bad! What, can't swim?"

"I can, but if you don't shut your mouth we'll be testing to see if you can."

"I'm not the biggest fan of water-this is quite possibly the worst place we could have ended up in my book..."

"How about we go get Mcdonalds? That will make you feel better!"

"I need some time to myself-bring me back a McChicken, guys."

 

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(Edith keeps blinking sedrftyguh)

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"Hey look, a tree!"

"Oh geez, he's already leaving-how does he move so fast? We just ate half our body weight in Mcdonalds, which we bought with my dad's money-"

"We should go after him. He'll get himself killed, knowing Kevin."

 

"I haven't eaten nuts in forever!"

"Don't get so excited, none of us can even crack them."

"Stop crushing my dreams!"

"Stop being an idiot!"

"Um, hello?"

 

All at once, the three went silent, turning to see a small nicheling holding an acorn, staring at them with wide and fearful eyes.

"Y-you said you can't crack them? I can...you can have mine if you want..."

The little nicheling held out the acorn, nervously dropping it in front of Kevin. Who proceeded to scream.

"oH MY GOOOODDDD, SHE'S SO CUTE-"

 

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After Kevin calmed down from his outburst and Rezu went out fishing, the following scene happened-

 

"We didn't expect to find anyone else here. I'm sorry for Kevin-he has issues."

"Hey!"

"Anyway, what's your name?"

"C-Christine..."

"And I thought my name was stu-"

"Nice to meet you, Christine. We won't hurt you, promise. Kevin is just loud, Rezu has an ego bigger than his head, and I'm...not as much of a jerk as I act like?"

"Yeah, sure you aren't-"

"Where's your family? Surely they didn't leave you here alone?"

"I...don't want to talk about it..."

"Oh! Do you wanna come with us? We can buy you Mcdonalds!"

"Sure..."

 

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"Kevin, get off the rock."

"No."

"Get off the rock!"

"No!"

"Get off the damn rock before you break something!"

"bUT EDDDDIIIIITHHHHHH-"

"IF YOU SAY MY NAME LIKE THAT ONE MORE TIME I WILL BREAK YOUR NECK BEFORE YOU GET A CHANCE TO FALL!"

 

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"When did we get here? Weren't we just at the swamp?"

"Was it all too fast for your peanut brain to comprehend? We ran through there really fast."

"The water looks weird...why is it purple, Edith?"

"Not sure, Savannahs are weird."

"I've only been to one once, would have preffered to never come back."

 

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