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polly homethread (v6??) where i am cringe but i am free


polly

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[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!

Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community


[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!

Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!

Hahahahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need

If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!

Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?

Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?

You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you
 *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned

You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key

Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City

See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area

But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!

Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?

Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!

And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic

So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic

Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it

And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!

Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community


[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!

Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!

Hahahahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need

If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!

Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?

Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?

You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you
 *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned

You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key

Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City

See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area

But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!

Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?

Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!

And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic

So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic

Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it

And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!

Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community


[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!

Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!

Hahahahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need

If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!

Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?

Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?

You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you
 *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned

You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key

Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City

See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area

But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!

Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?

Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!

And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic

So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic

Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it

And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!

Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community


[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!

Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!

Hahahahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need

If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!

Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?

Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?

You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you
 *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned

You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key

Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City

See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area

But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!

Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?

Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!

And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic

So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic

Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it

And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!

Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community


[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!

Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!

Hahahahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need

If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!

Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?

Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?

You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you
 *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned

You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key

Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City

See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area

But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!

Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?

Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!

And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic

So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic

Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it

And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!

Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community


[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!

Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!

Hahahahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need

If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!

Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?

Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?

You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you
 *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned

You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key

Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City

See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area

But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!

Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?

Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!

And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic

So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic

Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it

And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!

Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community


[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!

Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!

Hahahahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need

If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!

Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?

Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?

You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you
 *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned

You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key

Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City

See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area

But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!

Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?

Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!

And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic

So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic

Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it

And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!

Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community


[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!

Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!

Hahahahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need

If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!

Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?

Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?

You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you
 *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned

You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key

Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City

See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area

But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!

Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?

Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!

And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic

So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic

Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it

And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!
Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community

[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!
Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!
Hahahahahaha!
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!
Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?
Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?
You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned
You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key
Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City
See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area
But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!
Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?
Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!
And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic
So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic
Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it
And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Redesign your logo, we know what we're doing
We are here to help you, everything's connected
Time is of the essence, we live in the future
Color makes us hungry, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, we know how to do it
Make the calculations, put them into action
We will find the angle, starting with convention
On to innovation, everything's connected
Here we have a circle, smooth and inoffensive
This will be the basis for your revolution
Gravity is crucial, geomagnetism
With some calculation, we will find your logo
DNA is crucial, we must understand it
In the human genome, we will find your logo
Everyone will see it, every demographic
If they fail to see it, are they even human?
Every demographic, men 18 to 30
College educated women over 40
Suicidal poets, fat midwestern fathers
Kids with diabetes, pentecostal preachers
Mothers under 20, interracial couples
Atheist professors, government employees
Xenophobes and racists, private aviators
Everyone will see it, every demographic
Think about it this way: guided evolution
This will be a new breed, cutting edge but classic
Fully complementary, bold and self-sufficient
Symbolizing freedom and, of course, your product
When the logo's finished, then we will unveil it
Seven billion people instantly enlightened
Everyone's rebranded, all the fighting's over
Say goodbye to conflict, that design's rejected
There's no longer language, only recognition
There's no longer country, only corporate colors
Color makes us hungry, hunger makes us human
Everyone can see it, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
(Give us all your money)
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!

Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community


[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!

Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!

Hahahahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need

If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!

Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?

Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?

You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you
 *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned

You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key

Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City

See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area

But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!

Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?

Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!

And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic

So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic

Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it

And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Redesign your logo, we know what we're doing
We are here to help you, everything's connected
Time is of the essence, we live in the future
Color makes us hungry, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, we know how to do it
Make the calculations, put them into action
We will find the angle, starting with convention
On to innovation, everything's connected
Here we have a circle, smooth and inoffensive
This will be the basis for your revolution
Gravity is crucial, geomagnetism
With some calculation, we will find your logo
DNA is crucial, we must understand it
In the human genome, we will find your logo
Everyone will see it, every demographic
If they fail to see it, are they even human?
Every demographic, men 18 to 30
College educated women over 40
Suicidal poets, fat midwestern fathers
Kids with diabetes, pentecostal preachers
Mothers under 20, interracial couples
Atheist professors, government employees
Xenophobes and racists, private aviators
Everyone will see it, every demographic
Think about it this way: guided evolution
This will be a new breed, cutting edge but classic
Fully complementary, bold and self-sufficient
Symbolizing freedom and, of course, your product
When the logo's finished, then we will unveil it
Seven billion people instantly enlightened
Everyone's rebranded, all the fighting's over
Say goodbye to conflict, that design's rejected
There's no longer language, only recognition
There's no longer country, only corporate colors
Color makes us hungry, hunger makes us human
Everyone can see it, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
(Give us all your money)
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!

Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community


[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!

Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!

Hahahahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need

If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!

Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?

Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?

You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you
 *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned

You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key

Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City

See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area

But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!

Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?

Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!

And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic

So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic

Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it

And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Redesign your logo, we know what we're doing
We are here to help you, everything's connected
Time is of the essence, we live in the future
Color makes us hungry, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, we know how to do it
Make the calculations, put them into action
We will find the angle, starting with convention
On to innovation, everything's connected
Here we have a circle, smooth and inoffensive
This will be the basis for your revolution
Gravity is crucial, geomagnetism
With some calculation, we will find your logo
DNA is crucial, we must understand it
In the human genome, we will find your logo
Everyone will see it, every demographic
If they fail to see it, are they even human?
Every demographic, men 18 to 30
College educated women over 40
Suicidal poets, fat midwestern fathers
Kids with diabetes, pentecostal preachers
Mothers under 20, interracial couples
Atheist professors, government employees
Xenophobes and racists, private aviators
Everyone will see it, every demographic
Think about it this way: guided evolution
This will be a new breed, cutting edge but classic
Fully complementary, bold and self-sufficient
Symbolizing freedom and, of course, your product
When the logo's finished, then we will unveil it
Seven billion people instantly enlightened
Everyone's rebranded, all the fighting's over
Say goodbye to conflict, that design's rejected
There's no longer language, only recognition
There's no longer country, only corporate colors
Color makes us hungry, hunger makes us human
Everyone can see it, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
(Give us all your money)
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!

Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community


[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!

Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!

Hahahahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need

If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!

Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?

Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?

You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you
 *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned

You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key

Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City

See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area

But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!

Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?

Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!

And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic

So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic

Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it

And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Redesign your logo, we know what we're doing
We are here to help you, everything's connected
Time is of the essence, we live in the future
Color makes us hungry, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, we know how to do it
Make the calculations, put them into action
We will find the angle, starting with convention
On to innovation, everything's connected
Here we have a circle, smooth and inoffensive
This will be the basis for your revolution
Gravity is crucial, geomagnetism
With some calculation, we will find your logo
DNA is crucial, we must understand it
In the human genome, we will find your logo
Everyone will see it, every demographic
If they fail to see it, are they even human?
Every demographic, men 18 to 30
College educated women over 40
Suicidal poets, fat midwestern fathers
Kids with diabetes, pentecostal preachers
Mothers under 20, interracial couples
Atheist professors, government employees
Xenophobes and racists, private aviators
Everyone will see it, every demographic
Think about it this way: guided evolution
This will be a new breed, cutting edge but classic
Fully complementary, bold and self-sufficient
Symbolizing freedom and, of course, your product
When the logo's finished, then we will unveil it
Seven billion people instantly enlightened
Everyone's rebranded, all the fighting's over
Say goodbye to conflict, that design's rejected
There's no longer language, only recognition
There's no longer country, only corporate colors
Color makes us hungry, hunger makes us human
Everyone can see it, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
(Give us all your money)
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Redesign your logo, we know what we're doing
We are here to help you, everything's connected
Time is of the essence, we live in the future
Color makes us hungry, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, we know how to do it
Make the calculations, put them into action
We will find the angle, starting with convention
On to innovation, everything's connected
Here we have a circle, smooth and inoffensive
This will be the basis for your revolution
Gravity is crucial, geomagnetism
With some calculation, we will find your logo
DNA is crucial, we must understand it
In the human genome, we will find your logo
Everyone will see it, every demographic
If they fail to see it, are they even human?
Every demographic, men 18 to 30
College educated women over 40
Suicidal poets, fat midwestern fathers
Kids with diabetes, pentecostal preachers
Mothers under 20, interracial couples
Atheist professors, government employees
Xenophobes and racists, private aviators
Everyone will see it, every demographic
Think about it this way: guided evolution
This will be a new breed, cutting edge but classic
Fully complementary, bold and self-sufficient
Symbolizing freedom and, of course, your product
When the logo's finished, then we will unveil it
Seven billion people instantly enlightened
Everyone's rebranded, all the fighting's over
Say goodbye to conflict, that design's rejected
There's no longer language, only recognition
There's no longer country, only corporate colors
Color makes us hungry, hunger makes us human
Everyone can see it, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
(Give us all your money)
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!
Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community

[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!
Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!
Hahahahahaha!
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!
Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?
Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?
You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned
You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key
Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City
See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area
But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!
Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?
Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!
And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic
So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic
Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it
And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked

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Redesign your logo, we know what we're doing
We are here to help you, everything's connected
Time is of the essence, we live in the future
Color makes us hungry, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, we know how to do it
Make the calculations, put them into action
We will find the angle, starting with convention
On to innovation, everything's connected
Here we have a circle, smooth and inoffensive
This will be the basis for your revolution
Gravity is crucial, geomagnetism
With some calculation, we will find your logo
DNA is crucial, we must understand it
In the human genome, we will find your logo
Everyone will see it, every demographic
If they fail to see it, are they even human?
Every demographic, men 18 to 30
College educated women over 40
Suicidal poets, fat midwestern fathers
Kids with diabetes, pentecostal preachers
Mothers under 20, interracial couples
Atheist professors, government employees
Xenophobes and racists, private aviators
Everyone will see it, every demographic
Think about it this way: guided evolution
This will be a new breed, cutting edge but classic
Fully complementary, bold and self-sufficient
Symbolizing freedom and, of course, your product
When the logo's finished, then we will unveil it
Seven billion people instantly enlightened
Everyone's rebranded, all the fighting's over
Say goodbye to conflict, that design's rejected
There's no longer language, only recognition
There's no longer country, only corporate colors
Color makes us hungry, hunger makes us human
Everyone can see it, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
(Give us all your money)
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!

Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community


[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!

Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!

Hahahahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need

If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!

Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?

Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?

You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you
 *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned

You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key

Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City

See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area

But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!

Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?

Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!

And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic

So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic

Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it

And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Redesign your logo, we know what we're doing
We are here to help you, everything's connected
Time is of the essence, we live in the future
Color makes us hungry, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, we know how to do it
Make the calculations, put them into action
We will find the angle, starting with convention
On to innovation, everything's connected
Here we have a circle, smooth and inoffensive
This will be the basis for your revolution
Gravity is crucial, geomagnetism
With some calculation, we will find your logo
DNA is crucial, we must understand it
In the human genome, we will find your logo
Everyone will see it, every demographic
If they fail to see it, are they even human?
Every demographic, men 18 to 30
College educated women over 40
Suicidal poets, fat midwestern fathers
Kids with diabetes, pentecostal preachers
Mothers under 20, interracial couples
Atheist professors, government employees
Xenophobes and racists, private aviators
Everyone will see it, every demographic
Think about it this way: guided evolution
This will be a new breed, cutting edge but classic
Fully complementary, bold and self-sufficient
Symbolizing freedom and, of course, your product
When the logo's finished, then we will unveil it
Seven billion people instantly enlightened
Everyone's rebranded, all the fighting's over
Say goodbye to conflict, that design's rejected
There's no longer language, only recognition
There's no longer country, only corporate colors
Color makes us hungry, hunger makes us human
Everyone can see it, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
(Give us all your money)
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Redesign your logo, we know what we're doing
We are here to help you, everything's connected
Time is of the essence, we live in the future
Color makes us hungry, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, we know how to do it
Make the calculations, put them into action
We will find the angle, starting with convention
On to innovation, everything's connected
Here we have a circle, smooth and inoffensive
This will be the basis for your revolution
Gravity is crucial, geomagnetism
With some calculation, we will find your logo
DNA is crucial, we must understand it
In the human genome, we will find your logo
Everyone will see it, every demographic
If they fail to see it, are they even human?
Every demographic, men 18 to 30
College educated women over 40
Suicidal poets, fat midwestern fathers
Kids with diabetes, pentecostal preachers
Mothers under 20, interracial couples
Atheist professors, government employees
Xenophobes and racists, private aviators
Everyone will see it, every demographic
Think about it this way: guided evolution
This will be a new breed, cutting edge but classic
Fully complementary, bold and self-sufficient
Symbolizing freedom and, of course, your product
When the logo's finished, then we will unveil it
Seven billion people instantly enlightened
Everyone's rebranded, all the fighting's over
Say goodbye to conflict, that design's rejected
There's no longer language, only recognition
There's no longer country, only corporate colors
Color makes us hungry, hunger makes us human
Everyone can see it, everything's connected
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
Redesign your logo, give us all your money
(Give us all your money)
Link to comment
Share on other sites

[Intro]
Woah! If it isn't a Lightner!
Hey, hey, hey!
Looks like you’re all alone on a late night
All your friends abandoned you for the slime, you are?
Sales gone down the drain, drain?
Living in a goddamn garbage can?
Hahahahaha!

Friend, either you're closing your eyes
To savings you do not wish to acknowledge
Or you are not aware of the calibre of discounts
Indicated by the presence of a heart-shaped object
In your community


[Verse 1]
Hey kid, look at you! Right time, right place
Ripe for the picking, right monеy in your pocket!
You’re so lucky! Very lucky! Oh, so vеry, very lucky!
That you get to be investing in this very special product
From everybody’s favorite number-one rated salesman, circa 1997
Mighty proud to say it! Mighty proud to say it!
Yes, I’m mighty proud to say it! Yes sir!

Don’t you want to have a little fun, little sponge?
Little something to pluck you from the glum humdrum?
Live comfortably, capital at risk, yum-yum!
Listen up! For the offer only comes just once
Hey, chum! I can see you’re having violent thoughts
But don’t you wanna, wanna be a, be a big shot?
Enquire today while the secret’s in stock!
All you gotta do is hyperlink blocked
I used to be nothing but the email guy
Now I’m the "It burns! Ow! Stop! Help me! It burns!" guy!

Hahahahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need

If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 2]
Are you feeling down? Have you lost control?
Is your life a mess? Do your friends despise you?
Well, here’s one weird trick discovered by a mom
And I’m sure number five will surprise you!
All you’ve ever dreamed of, shining, glistening!
Gotta buckle up! Grab life by the silly string!
You can have it! You can have it! Say the word, it’s yours!
Hahahahaha! I wasn’t listening
See, it says just here, right here, last year
On the third of the fourth at five-oh-six
You searched cat pics online, well, that’s just fine
Moist, delicious cookies
Little tippy-tap kitty catalyst, now we have a list
And we’ll guess what every habit is
Wanna buy a cat flap? Cat food? Catchup? Catamaran?
You’ll be categorically catatonic
At the catalogue of categories I have at my hands
A cavalcade of all your favorite brands
An advertism schism cataclysm, cash on demand!
You’d better cancel your plans
Cash for the crackers and the pickles and the flypaper!

Wanna buy a cat plush? Plush toy? Toy box? Box wine?
Why won’t Mike just call me?
Backgammon? Ham and eggs? Egg chair? Chair bed?
Bed bath? Bath sponge? Sponge who hates its $4.99
Life boat? Boat shoe? Shoestring? String bean?
Bean bag? Bagpipes? Pipe bomb? Bomber jacket?
Jackdaw? Doorstop?
Stop! No, please! Don’t take my furniture!
Stopwatch? Watchdog? Dog collar? Colorado?
Adderall? Ads are all seeping
Ping pong? Ponchos? Choke chains? Chainsaws?
Swordfish? Shish kebab? Bobcat?
Do you want a cat or not?

Well, you wanna be a big shot, don’t you?
Don’t you wanna be the next big thing?

You can do it! Yes, it’s true, it’s really true
There’s nothing to it, I can prove it, hear the registers ring!
Ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring, ring
You’re kidding? It’s for you
 *garbage noise*
Wanna know a secret? Hyperlink blocked
You too can have a communion with, hahahaha!
Soon, I’ll even surpass that damned clown around town!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 3]
Holy cungadero there, you funky, little worm
You seem unaware of all the money you could earn
If you wanna get the gold
Well, there is stuff you gotta learn
Milk the humans of their kindness
Then there’s butter to be churned

You want it, need it, don't you see?
But if you wanna make your screen green
You’re gonna need my kromer key

Yes, you’ve got trouble, my friend, whadayatalk?
Right here in Cyber City

See, I used to be a top-notch big shot!
Best deals! Best wheels! Best, best prices in the tri-state area

But you can get it back! Hahaha! Yes, you can!
All you gotta do is follow through my twelve-step plan
Bigger, bigger, better like the telephone was telling me
You gotta know the territory! Spend a hand, lend a grand
Who’s gonna patronize a little bitty
Two-by-four kinda store anymore?
Gotta go! Gotta get! Gotta get on and go!

Make a deal! Big deal, high score! Our store is closing
Hot tip! Drop shipping! Four, three, two, one
Not skipping offers wired into your inbox
Swing by the gift shop! Think of the big shot!
All this and more, click, hyperlink blocked
Can anyone hear me? Help
Mike, Mike? Hahahaha!
 
 
[Chorus]
We’ve got never bettered bargains
We’ve got deals you won’t believe
We can tell you what you want
Before you realise what you need
If you’ll pardon us the jargon
Here’s our Darkner guarantee
We take cash or card or credit
But we’ll take your heart for free

[Verse 4]
Insurance! Know that I’m the best in policy!
Honestly, do you want to end in poverty?

Buddy, I’m the one to help invest it properly!
I’m here to talk about extended warranty!
It’s a super bumper, liquidation, last chance
First day, half price, fire sale like never before!

And it’s there to explore, when you step in the door
The very model of a modern major general store!
But the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the haves are very glad it's
Just the haven'ts that're lacking what they’re having
Now the ads have got the traffic
And we’ve grabbed your demographic

So you’re packing up your basket
'Cause your dad has gotta have it
He’ll be sad if you don’t wrap it with a tag, it’ll be tragic
So you’re manically grabbing at the shelves amid the panic

Seems that everybody has it, man, you really gotta have it
So you get it, you’re ecstatic but a crackle in the static
And the it is out of fashion, just a fad, a piece of plastic
So you trash it then you get back into your car
'Cause you don’t have it

And the fact is everybody’s gotta have it, gotta have it
Those who have it really have it
If you haven’t, well, you’ve had it, couldn’t hack it
Now the haven'ts haven't had it and the hads are very glad it's
Hochi-mama, what a mouthful!
In the encyclopedia of being afraid
There ain’t nothing to be scared of 'til there’s fees to be paid
There’s deals to be made with seasonal savings!
Regional ratings are lethally fading
Screaming and raving, ceaseless appraising
[Neat, little plate with a needless engraving]
Legally grey but sweet with the phrasing
Feet in the grave but gleefully trading
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Deals so good I’ll **** myself
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Gone with the sugar barrel, pickle barrel, milk pan
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
I can feel that smooth taste already!
Feeding the cravings, eat little plaything
Hyperlink blocked
Link to comment
Share on other sites

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