Jump to content
Stray Fawn Community

The Chenthya Queendom


Sky

Recommended Posts

Just now, Green the Fiery Fox said:

o ok time to go react now

I read it all

if you tell me you read it you don't need to react to all of it. I just want to know that people are reading it so I will keep on writing :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

25 minutes ago, Sky said:

I found my second gem in my nest today.

in the Kikonokian world, Nichelings find their gems in their nest, or wherever they were sleeping. They always have the feeling that they need to touch it to their chest. When they do, it sticks to their fur and fuses with their skin, becoming a part of them and becoming an indicator of how much energy they have. If their gem color changes, their old one falls off. A replacement is found in the morning. The gems are said to be deposited by Sprigflower, who they say has a giant stash of gems. She gives hers away to others, and takes old ones that fell off or whose owners died and puts them back in her collection.

  • Like 1
  • Paw up 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Sky said:

I need this cuteness (and sadness) to be seen immediately. !! EMERGENCY MENTIONING !! (I'm really sorry if you don't like being mentioned like this...tell me and I'll try and remember)

@UWOaether @Green the Fiery Fox @Pancrack @Flower @gamingcookie @TundraKitsune @Zixvir @sadslime @SilverHowl

if youre talkin about the gif that is Very Cute ! i will read through this playthrough later

  • Like 1
  • Paw up 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Since you don't seem to mind hearing opinions here's mine so far. (I'll delete this if you want me to, no hard feelings)

 <I LOVE THIS> 

I honestly enjoyed Chenthya's personality. I found myself smiling when she was mean to Adam (I know I'm evil but just something about her confidence that Adam wouldn't murder her in her sleep was funny to read) She was honest with herself and knew what she wanted, I can appreciate that. Low key bummed she didn't go out fighting but was still so fitting that till the day she died she never once thought of ever loving Adam or falling in love with him.

I didn't feel much for Rahzere (Maybe cause I had a feeling she wouldn't last long so my brain was like "Don't get attached") She was like her mother confident in herself but clearly not as clever as her mother. Her mother was a class A manipulator, while Rahzere insulted everyone and didn't expect that she'll get killed. Although Mii doing the killing was a surprise I for sure thought all the brothers will band together and tear her apart.

Mii's personality or well her goal isn't clear for me. She was clearly raised by Chenthya but her personality and goal is more inline with her father Adam. Could be she just have seen how everyone, not including her mother and sister, treated him quite well and wanted that for herself. She doesn't appear to have any nefarious intentions. I like the strong contrast between the sisters in this aspect. Loves her child despite his lacking qualities shows her compassion.  And currently all my brain can think is, is this some trick.

  • Like 3
  • Love 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

50 minutes ago, FawnCat said:

Since you don't seem to mind hearing opinions here's mine so far. (I'll delete this if you want me to, no hard feelings)

 <I LOVE THIS> 

I honestly enjoyed Chenthya's personality. I found myself smiling when she was mean to Adam (I know I'm evil but just something about her confidence that Adam wouldn't murder her in her sleep was funny to read) She was honest with herself and knew what she wanted, I can appreciate that. Low key bummed she didn't go out fighting but was still so fitting that till the day she died she never once thought of ever loving Adam or falling in love with him.

I didn't feel much for Rahzere (Maybe cause I had a feeling she wouldn't last long so my brain was like "Don't get attached") She was like her mother confident in herself but clearly not as clever as her mother. Her mother was a class A manipulator, while Rahzere insulted everyone and didn't expect that she'll get killed. Although Mii doing the killing was a surprise I for sure thought all the brothers will band together and tear her apart.

Mii's personality or well her goal isn't clear for me. She was clearly raised by Chenthya but her personality and goal is more inline with her father Adam. Could be she just have seen how everyone, not including her mother and sister, treated him quite well and wanted that for herself. She doesn't appear to have any nefarious intentions. I like the strong contrast between the sisters in this aspect. Loves her child despite his lacking qualities shows her compassion.  And currently all my brain can think is, is this some trick.

very glad you love it :D (seeing the 30 notifications from you reacting to everything made me smile) I'm happy to hear all opinions, good or bad—I want to improve! feel welcome to keep on giving opinions and where you think the storyline will go, sometimes I'm like "why did I not write it like that" and if you tell me in time I might be influenced ;) (like, making Mii have secret intentions would've been cool but it's too late for that now, she's too good in my heart for me to do that)

Mii was more raised by Chenthya, but she was more like her dad and liked him more too. Chenthya kept her close but focused her attention on Rahzere so Mii had some chances to watch and sometimes interact with her dad and brothers. She realized the differences between her mom and dad and chose Adam over Chenthya. (Though she knew Chenthya was evil, she still loved her—she was her mom.) I assure you, she doesn't have any "nefarious intentions." (Sorry, spoilers. But I need you to think of her as nice as I do!) However, I will be adding to my character keeper (a doc every nicheling's name, personality, and views on ranking (i.e. Females should rule over all, Males and Female should be equals, etc), even those of dead nichelings just in case) each nicheling's "goal". (Like Jesper in Klaus said, everyone wants something.) It might not be so much as "kill everyone and take over mwahahaha" as "keep mom not as sad". I'm really bad at forgetting what I wrote their personality was and just going my own way though.

  • Like 1
  • Eek! 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

5 minutes ago, Sky said:

very glad you love it :D (seeing the 30 notifications from you reacting to everything made me smile) I'm happy to hear all opinions, good or bad—I want to improve! feel welcome to keep on giving opinions and where you think the storyline will go, sometimes I'm like "why did I not write it like that" and if you tell me in time I might be influenced ;) (like, making Mii have secret intentions would've been cool but it's too late for that now, she's too good in my heart for me to do that)

Mii was more raised by Chenthya, but she was more like her dad and liked him more too. Chenthya kept her close but focused her attention on Rahzere so Mii had some chances to watch and sometimes interact with her dad and brothers. She realized the differences between her mom and dad and chose Adam over Chenthya. (Though she knew Chenthya was evil, she still loved her—she was her mom.) I assure you, she doesn't have any "nefarious intentions." (Sorry, spoilers. But I need you to think of her as nice as I do!) However, I will be adding to my character keeper (a doc every nicheling's name, personality, and views on ranking (i.e. Females should rule over all, Males and Female should be equals, etc), even those of dead nichelings just in case) each nicheling's "goal". (Like Jesper in Klaus said, everyone wants something.) It might not be so much as "kill everyone and take over mwahahaha" as "keep mom not as sad". I'm really bad at forgetting what I wrote their personality was and just going my own way though.

by the way, here's what I have written for Mii in my character keeper (there isn't any spoilers, if you don't count what could've been there)

Mii     kind, innocent, energetic, emotional, loved her father M=B, F=A

(M=B means she thinks males should be treated well but not be alphas, and F=A means she thinks females should rule over males)

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Part Seventeen, Day Thirty-Eight — Chèèpi

 

20201215194451_1.thumb.jpg.e4a403939b756097198c548f4e6d5839.jpg

“Fray. That’ll be his name!” Mommy smiled at the little red baby between her paws. But her smile quickly faded. “Another boy, another crooked snout, another chance of a daughter lost.” She sighed. She had just begun to turn away when Fray rolled over and stuck his legs in the air, making Mommy smile again. “I’m sorry,” she whispered to Fray. (I shouldn’t have been listening, but I was.) “It’s not that I don’t love you, little one. I just...I’m getting old. I don’t have much time left. I just really need a little girl, and then I can rest.” Mommy set her head down.

Daddy walked over and nudged Mommy. He began licking her in icky places so I ran away. I saw Uncle Onoko laying down on some swampy leaves nearby, so I went to go visit him.

“Hi, Uncle Onoko!” I stopped beside him. His cloudy, scarred eyes stared at me without seeing.

“Hello…” he paused for a moment. “Cheeper? Is that your name?” He was the same age as Mommy—they were twins, after all—but he looked even older and weaker than her.

“No, Uncle Onoko. I’m Chèèpi.”

“Yes. Chèèpi. That was it.” He yawned and dipped his paw in the stream that bordered his nest. He wiggled his toes in the cool water. “I’m getting old. Rahzere’s strength and my naive bravery has cost me time.”

I sighed and laid down beside him, wiggling my own toes in the water. “Mommy and Daddy are getting old too. I don’t know if I’m going to get a sister. I might have to take the Leaves of Home and find someone else to be Queen. I don’t want to do that.”

“And I hope you don’t little one. But it may come to it. You’ll have found your third gem by then, though.” He nudged me with his nose in the spot where my third gem will one day go.

“Uncle Onoko?”

“Yes?”

“What if I don’t find a new Queen?”

“Then...Fray will find one. And if he doesn't, Minduk will."

"But...what if neither of them find one?"

"I...I'm sure they will, little one."

— — —

1746379743_recycled(1).gif.d4cb24157c9cb96358be18751ef38c13.gif

I spent two nights with Uncle Onoko. He seemed lonely, since Mommy was occupied with trying for a daughter. On the second morning, I found his bones beside me. Mommy had told me about how, when someone dies, they turn to dust and their bones stay for a few days before blowing away too. It still scared me, though. My third gem was lying in his eye socket. I wondered if it was Uncle Onoko’s. With this gem was more responsibility. I took it and gently pressed it to my chest where Uncle Onoko had nudged me not long ago. It fused to my smooth brown skin quickly.

20201216162947_1.thumb.jpg.e7725d6a96b626dc05782ede26d89a14.jpg

After I got my gem I went back to Mommy and Daddy. (The tell me I’m too old to call them that anymore, but I ignore them.) Fray already had his second gem, and was watching over the newest baby—another boy with the same crooked snout as me and Fray. He told me Mommy and Daddy were “doing yucky stuff” around the corner. I made sure not to even glance that way.

Fray told me the new baby—who was even fluffier than Fray, and would probably be just as big as Daddy one day— was named Minduk. Mommy had barely had the energy to get out of her nest after he was born, but she got up anyways because she had a duty. Fray was worried about her. He didn’t realize that time is running out for Mommy and Daddy. They’ll be dead soon...but I can’t think about that now.

I have to enjoy the time I have left.

  • Like 2
  • Sad 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

18 hours ago, Sky said:

very glad you love it :D (seeing the 30 notifications from you reacting to everything made me smile) I'm happy to hear all opinions, good or bad—I want to improve! feel welcome to keep on giving opinions and where you think the storyline will go, sometimes I'm like "why did I not write it like that" and if you tell me in time I might be influenced ;) (like, making Mii have secret intentions would've been cool but it's too late for that now, she's too good in my heart for me to do that)

Mii was more raised by Chenthya, but she was more like her dad and liked him more too. Chenthya kept her close but focused her attention on Rahzere so Mii had some chances to watch and sometimes interact with her dad and brothers. She realized the differences between her mom and dad and chose Adam over Chenthya. (Though she knew Chenthya was evil, she still loved her—she was her mom.) I assure you, she doesn't have any "nefarious intentions." (Sorry, spoilers. But I need you to think of her as nice as I do!) However, I will be adding to my character keeper (a doc every nicheling's name, personality, and views on ranking (i.e. Females should rule over all, Males and Female should be equals, etc), even those of dead nichelings just in case) each nicheling's "goal". (Like Jesper in Klaus said, everyone wants something.) It might not be so much as "kill everyone and take over mwahahaha" as "keep mom not as sad". I'm really bad at forgetting what I wrote their personality was and just going my own way though.

That's good that she's good but now I feel super pity for her, even more so after this last chapter. I hope she gets a daughter unless the your idea is to get a new blood queen. Mii needs a little girl (just cause I'll feel sad if she didn't have one 😃), but you can make her not want to be queen since she would be the only female surrounded with males and probably Mii will be dead and not able to teach her. Who know (Well you do😆) Can't wait for the next chapter.

18 hours ago, Sky said:

by the way, here's what I have written for Mii in my character keeper (there isn't any spoilers, if you don't count what could've been there)

Mii     kind, innocent, energetic, emotional, loved her father M=B, F=A

(M=B means she thinks males should be treated well but not be alphas, and F=A means she thinks females should rule over males)

That's pretty interesting, might just steal it to use for myself 😁. I'm pretty bad at remembering things like this too.

ps. What happened to Onoko's son?

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, FawnCat said:

That's good that she's good but now I feel super pity for her, even more so after this last chapter. I hope she gets a daughter unless the your idea is to get a new blood queen. Mii needs a little girl (just cause I'll feel sad if she didn't have one 😃), but you can make her not want to be queen since she would be the only female surrounded with males and probably Mii will be dead and not able to teach her. Who know (Well you do😆) Can't wait for the next chapter.

That's pretty interesting, might just steal it to use for myself 😁. I'm pretty bad at remembering things like this too.

ps. What happened to Onoko's son?

so far my plan is "make Mii have kids until A. she dies or B. she has a daughter then figure out what happens" xD

Pnuma's chillin', he went exploring and found a lovely nest with a toxic berry bush that has a thorn-and-rock barrier around it. he hopes that he'll find a mate (whether that's the next wanderer, a daughter of Mii, or even a grandaughter of Mii) before he gets old

20201216200143_1.thumb.jpg.467d06112a6e52d953a64df35f20275a.jpg

  • Eek! 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

3 hours ago, Sky said:

20201215194451_1.thumb.jpg.e4a403939b756097198c548f4e6d5839.jpg
“Fray. That’ll be his name!” Mommy smiled at the little red baby between her paws. But her smile quickly faded. “Another boy, another crooked snout, another chance of a daughter lost.” She sighed. She had just begun to turn away when Fray rolled over and stuck his legs in the air, making Mommy smile again. “I’m sorry,” she whispered to Fray. (I shouldn’t have been listening, but I was.) “It’s not that I don’t love you, little one. I just...I’m getting old. I don’t have much time left. I just really need a little girl, and then I can rest.” Mommy set her head down.

Daddy walked over and nudged Mommy. He began licking her in icky places so I ran away. I saw Uncle Onoko laying down on some swampy leaves nearby, so I went to go visit him.

“Hi, Uncle Onoko!” I stopped beside him. His cloudy, scarred eyes stared at me without seeing.

“Hello…” he paused for a moment. “Cheeper? Is that your name?” He was the same age as Mommy—they were twins, after all—but he looked even older and weaker than her.

“No, Uncle Onoko. I’m Chèèpi.”

“Yes. Chèèpi. That was it.” He yawned and dipped his paw in the stream that bordered his nest. He wiggled his toes in the cool water. “I’m getting old. Rahzere’s strength and my naive bravery has cost me time.”

I sighed and laid down beside him, wiggling my own toes in the water. “Mommy and Daddy are getting old too. I don’t know if I’m going to get a sister. I might have to take the Leaves of Home and find someone else to be Queen. I don’t want to do that.”

“And I hope you don’t little one. But it may come to it. You’ll have found your third gem by then, though.” He nudged me with his nose in the spot where my third gem will one day go.

“Uncle Onoko?”
“Yes?”

“What if I don’t find a new Queen?”

“Then...Fray will find one. And if he doesn't, Minduk will."

"But...what if neither of them find one?"

"I...I'm sure they will, little one."

— — —

recycled.gif.374404aa6939612dc9501eeeef53ec32.gif

I spent two nights with Uncle Onoko. He seemed lonely, since Mommy was occupied with trying for a daughter. On the second morning, I found his bones beside me. Mommy had told me about how, when someone dies, they turn to dust and their bones stay for a few days before blowing away too. It still scared me, though. My third gem was lying in his eye socket. I wondered if it was Uncle Onoko’s. With this gem was more responsibility. I took it and gently pressed it to my chest where Uncle Onoko had nudged me not long ago. It fused to my brown rubbery skin quickly.

20201216162947_1.thumb.jpg.e7725d6a96b626dc05782ede26d89a14.jpg

After I got my gem I went back to Mommy and Daddy. (The tell me I’m too old to call them that anymore, but I ignore them.) Fray already had his second gem, and was watching over the newest baby—another boy with the same crooked snout as me and Fray. He told me Mommy and Daddy were “doing yucky stuff” around the corner. I made sure not to even glance that way.

Fray told me the new baby—who was even fluffier than Fray, and would probably be just as big as Daddy one day— was named Minduk. Mommy had barely had the energy to get out of her nest after he was born, but she got up anyways because she had a duty. Fray was worried about her. He didn’t realize that time is running out for Mommy and Daddy. They’ll be dead soon...but I can’t think about that now.

I have to enjoy the time I have left.

I was rushed to get this posted before I left for an while and forgot to put down the part number and day, whoopsie (editing it now)

  • Paw up 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

9 minutes ago, Sky said:

so far my plan is "make Mii have kids until A. she dies or B. she has a daughter then figure out what happens" xD

Pnuma's chillin', he went exploring and found a lovely nest with a toxic berry bush that has a thorn-and-rock barrier around it. he hopes that he'll find a mate (whether that's the next wanderer, a daughter of Mii, or even a grandaughter of Mii) before he gets old

20201216200143_1.thumb.jpg.467d06112a6e52d953a64df35f20275a.jpg

He looks like his grandfather. 😃 Well I'm excited to see where this go.

  • Thanks 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, Sky said:

since Chenthya's cursing Mii so all her kids are ugly, I have to use console to give them derp snout and it's sad having to change these beautiful toxic fangs into ugly crooked teeth

[hits 'pass day' button and sobs because a really pretty baby was borna nd I have to make them UGLY]

 

also p.s. so far all of the kids have just been plain ol boys, no consoling needed. I'm not cheating these boys, I swear

  • Haha 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 minutes ago, Sky said:

since Chenthya's cursing Mii so all her kids are ugly, I have to use console to give them derp snout and it's sad having to change these beautiful toxic fangs into ugly crooked teeth

I feel your pain. I was thinking that's what you have to do. Are you ever going to have one that was not pleased with the curse and without anyone knowing mate with another just to get a 'beautiful' baby?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

6 minutes ago, FawnCat said:

I feel your pain. I was thinking that's what you have to do. Are you ever going to have one that was not pleased with the curse and without anyone knowing mate with another just to get a 'beautiful' baby?

hmm, maybe one day. this curse will end with Mii but I have 10 other curse ideas (not just genetic related ones) written down for the future (though one is just "coronavirus" so um), which could all be given by different gods and goddesses. I also have a lot of other plot ideas written down (I have one main doc with all the plot ideas + the part that I'm working on + links to my other sources at the top for easy ref), including some of yours ;)

p.s. I'm so bad at paying attention to what I wrote down and even the actual game, i.e. not doing the right personality (I had to rewrite sooo many paragraphs once bc I forgot how Mii talked), moving someone then realizing that they're supposed to be in a nest, making up things as I go instead of looking at my plot ideas and choosing a good one, etc

  • Like 1
  • Eek! 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 hours ago, Sky said:

I haven't even written down what day the next part starts on and I've already drawn the new kids as humans. now this is procrastination

I'm just as bad instead of drawing my stories next picture. I did one of Queen Mii, enjoy. (Are we going to see the human kids?😃)

20201217_155817.thumb.jpg.4541ef8b19619203146c4f6022c31ebd.jpg

  • Like 3
  • Love 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

21 minutes ago, FawnCat said:

I'm just as bad instead of drawing my stories next picture. I did one of Queen Mii, enjoy. (Are we going to see the human kids?😃)

20201217_155817.thumb.jpg.4541ef8b19619203146c4f6022c31ebd.jpg

I LOVE ITTTT

(I'll post the sketch after the next part!)

  • Eek! 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 3 weeks later...
  • 8 months later...
17 hours ago, Chiyanna said:

I just read through this it's so good! I do hope you continue it at some point.

a month or two ago I wrote almost a whole part but for some reason I didn't finish it and haven't found the time/energy/spirit to continue. I hope to continue soon but first I want to do DuskClan 4 for a while and warm up my Niche writing skills : )

  • Paw up 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 4 weeks later...
  • 7 months later...

Part Eighteen, Day Forty-One — Pnuma
 
“Enkra, I don’t know what to do.” Mii’s voice was soft, but it still reached my ears. I didn’t mean to snoop at first, but here I was, hiding in the fringes of the Unknown, right around the corner from the Queen and her Adam. (Mii decided that would be the title of the mate of the Queen, after her dad. I don’t think there needs to be any other title than “Queen’s mate,” like we’d always used, but that wasn’t my decision to make.)

“I-I-I don’t know either.” Enkra’s muzzle was gray; it seemed hard for him to stay on his feet. Mii was only a berry better; despite her pregnancy (likely her last), she was thin. They had reached their final days, and still no heiress. Three sons — five, that is, with the new twins Jelno and Louie — but no daughters.

Mii sighed sadly. “Chèèpi is good and responsible. The Leaves of Home are in good paws—as long as he doesn’t slip and drop them into the ocean.” She let out a short but sad laugh. “He’ll take care of them until he finds a good Queen. He told me that he hopes he will be her mate, so that he may keep a close relationship with her and provide her with guidance. Or, if our last child is a miracle daughter, he will take care of her for all his days.”

Enkra laughed. “Look at you, using such wise words! Never thought I’d see the day. Glad I did. I miss the days when we’d just come to this island. We were free of Rahzere, free from worries of no heiress. We let our tongues run wild—you with your optimism, me with my anxiety.”

The two nichelings sat together for a moment, watching the sun slide behind the ocean waves. Mii gave her mate a final nuzzle and headed to her nest. I saw their children come to greet her. Chèèpi, kind and sweet, helped her into her nest. Minduk, large for a child, sat alone and didn’t acknowledge his mother. As much as I love kids, that one gave me the creeps. Jelno and Louis slept in their nest; Loui used his quiet brother as a pillow to snore away into the night.

I noticed that Enkra was limping along to the stream edge where Onoko’s bones still lay, and came closer, intending to accompany my uncle on his last night. Before I could do so, Fray sped past me to join his dad. He almost rammed into Enkra, stopping a whisker away from sending his father into the stream.

“DADDY! Daddy! I was looking for you!” He panted excitedly. “I found a shell for you!” He produced what was indeed a small gray shell that he had somehow stashed inside his ear. 

Enkra smiled down at him. “Thank you, Fray. I’ll make good use of it.” I turned away then. We all knew it was Uncle Enkra’s last day, except for the little ones. They’re too innocent to know. I couldn’t bear to watch any longer. I turned away, back to the Unknown, where I was alone and I could disappear. I had to find a mate - for myself or for my cousins.


image.thumb.jpeg.b69a8918f4f259d8e4e036f74caba064.jpeg

 

 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*dr frankenstein voice* IT'S ALLLIIIIIVVVEE!

yes it took me a year and a half but I'm continuing this and I hope y'all read it ❤️ its a sad note to start on but uh

  • Like 1
  • Eek! 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...