this is the best story i have ever heard
peculiar shady lady is 10/10
One day at a toy shop,I met a man selling apples,For money he wanted to swap,But I really wanted some apelles."Got any apelles?" asked I."For that's how I'll spend my money.""No apelles here!" said the guy.He seemed to find it quite funny."We've got some lovely cats,I'll give you a very fine price.""I'd rather have some ziggurats."The man blinked rapidly thrice.The man seemed exceptionally brainy,And his manner was strangely amused.He wasn't what I would call zany,Great disdain he noticeably oozed.Like others, he thought I was odd,Some say I'm a bit amazing.Still he gave me a courteous nod,As if he thought I was plenty blazing.So in search of my goal I departed,But before the toy shop could I leave,The man came running full-hearted,"I can help you I believe.""Apples, apelles, you shall find.Cats, ziggurats, you can get.You must now open your mind,And get down to New York Market.So to New York Market I decided to go,In search of the apelles I craved.The winds it did eerily blow.But I felt that the day could be saved.There were stalls selling crisps,Marbles in many shades.There were even stalls selling wispsPeople were scattered from many tradesI was greeted by a peculiar lady,She seemed to be rather amazingI couldn't help thinking she might be quite shady.I wondered if she was at all blazing.Before I could open my mouth,She shouted, "For you, I have some apelles!"I headed towards her, to the south,Past some cats and apples."But how did you know?" I asked,"Do you want them or not?" she did say.Silently, the apelles she passed.Then vanished before I could pay.As I walked away I hard a crackleOr was it, perhaps, a hushed cackle?